Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes
Alex Alexander
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Disappointment is the Cost of Friendship
• 22 minLast week’s guest said something that really stuck with me: “The cost of community is disappointment.” We feel disappointed when a friend cancels at the last minute, when someone doesn’t show up the way we hoped they would, when we feel left out, and when the birthday or baby shower or hard season does not look the way we imagined it would. And most of us do not really want to admit how much disappointment exists inside our friendships, because we want friendship to feel like joy, ease, fun, support, and belonging. In today’s episode, I’m talking about the many ways disappointment appears in friendship, why the opposite of disappointment might be apathy, and how I try to sit with it when it stings. In this episode you’ll hear about: How canceled plans, missed milestones, and feeling left out can all become different versions of the same feelingWhy I encourage my friends to hang out without me, and still sometimes feel sad when they doWhat slow-burn disappointments can do to a friendshipHow to tell the difference between a disappointment worth reflecting on and a repeated patternResources & Links Episode 146: Moving Past Inconvenience and Into the Joy of Helping Episode 191: How To Make Mom Friends When the Village Doesn’t Just Appear Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok! Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out! WANT MORE? My book, Are We Friends Yet? is here. Order your copy today! Dive into The Connection Reset. A 10-day private podcast to help you see the abundance of connection that already exists in your day-to-day (Yes. Really. I promise you have more than you realize). Start today.
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