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Friendship IRL

Alex Alexander



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Showing Up for People Who are Grieving With Aly Bird

• 55 min

TRIGGER WARNING: This episode contains some sensitive topics around the loss of loved ones. As you probably know by now, I’m no stranger to grief. My mom passed away when I was 13. It’s the club nobody wants to be a part of. Today I’m with Aly Bird, a coach, therapist-in-training, and the author of Grief Ally, about teaching people how to support their loved ones through the long haul of grief, which she knows about all too well, having lost her husband to a hiking accident back in 2019. When Aly’s inquiry showed up in my inbox, I couldn’t have said yes to having her on the show any faster. It’s exactly the kind of conversation I want to have on here. Grief hits people differently every time, and to be frank, it never goes away. It’s been 20 years since I lost my mom, and I still have moments of grief. In this episode, Aly and I cover it all, from showing up for grieving loved ones to remembering that all kinds of emotions can exist simultaneously - and how, sometimes, the best thing to do is surrender and let yourself feel all the feels. In this episode you’ll hear about: How supporting someone who’s grieving a LEARNED skill set that takes practice and transparencyThe different kinds of grief besides losing loved ones, from new parents grieving their freedom to empty-nesters grieving their full housesGrief’s never-ending quality, and how it’s never too late to offer your support, condolences, and willingness to be leaned onOne great way to support someone who’s grieving: sharing memories of the person lost, emphasizing that this person was real and seenSurrendering and letting ourselves to feel things like jealousy (but not acting on them), and how that can shorten the timeline of these unhappy emotionsNavigating the duality of life, where grief exists for one friend and a happy occasion exists for another at the same timeResources & Links Be sure to check out Aly’s amazing book, Grief Ally, and check out her website. Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram!  Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!

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